Friday, February 1, 2013

What did we do to deserve this?

     Oh the joys of Etsy. It is a plum place to find one of a kind accessories and beautiful hand made garments designed with love and affection for the fuller figure. However, it is also a minefield for piles of dog poo passed off as couture. Watch your step as you peruse the above images. You don't want to get it on your shoe and smear it on the rug. 

     Three themes come to mind when looking at the above images. The first one is "The Dead". I don't mean the deceased, I mean The Grateful Dead. They have a cult like following around the globe, and the merch doesn't end at shows. It also pops up online. And true to the ever inclusive "Dead Heads," form, they have their clothes available in all sizes. Yay? The "inspiration" halter dress and the rainbow skirted dress are all made by "Dead Heads." I bet they are really well constructed, seeing that they are not made in a Chinese factory. However, they are so fugly. Sometimes, the worst P.O.S's last the longest. 

     The second theme to leap out is tie dye. This often goes hand in hand with "Dead Head" tomfoolery, but lucky for us, it is also embraced by the online hippie contingent. Tents are bad. Tents are light years beyond unflattering. Tents that are tie dyed make this a fug-tropolis. 

     Thirdly, almost all of the above dresses lack shape. How they think this is flattering, I don't know. If the measurements of the hip width of the garment are three times the bust and four times the waist, you have yourself a fashion crime. In fact, all of the dresses are guilty. Guilty of being the ugliest dresses I could find on Etsy for plus sized women.I didn't include links, because I don't want to encourage traffic to their stores. They might interpret that as a thumbs up. We can't have that.  


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