Not Your Granny's Lace

     

     Lace has been popping up for a few seasons, now and we thought it best to give it some air time, so to speak. Lace has a feminine and old world charm, for women have been both making and wearing lace for hundreds of years. Lace as we know it has been around since the late 15th century making it the trend of the millenium! (It is giving rose gold and skulls a run for their money!) It was often a nod to a more ostentatious lifestyle and was handmade until the 1770's. Since then, lace has been produced using machines and in the here and now is no exception. Furthermore most of the lace garments that we interact with are synthetics, with nylon and viscose being the top candidates. 

    Enough with the history lesson and on to the fashion. Above are some juicy pieces that are flattering on pretty well any figure. The blue lace dress and the peach dress to the far right are a fit and flare style. These are perfect for women that a) want to create a waist or b) want to camouflage a fuller tummy. The sheath dresses on the left are lined, giving the lace a chance to skim the curves, rather than to cling to them.

The dresses can be found... (starting from the left)

1) Addition-Elle $129.00

2) Anna Scholz 245.00 Pounds

3) Macy's $63.74

4) Eshakti $119.95

     For those of us who like the look of classic, black lace, here are some great pieces. I have the dress and I want to emphatically drive home that this is one heck of a flattering dress. I wear it with a rhinestone brooch and pointed toe flats, and I am ready to go! The only problem? Cats. They love it. They can't get enough of walking all over me with their little kitty claws. It must be a fun texture for them. Sneaks. I also included the "trend overload!" top. Peplum and lace! Just think, in 15 years, you could wear it to a 2010's party, and everyone would know when it came from. 

Starting at the left:

1) Evans Sleeveless Blouse: 35 Pounds

2) Kiyonna Lace Dress: $158.00

3) Addition-Elle Lace Peplum Shirt: $49.99

    Finally, I have put together what I feel is a killer outfit. It juxtaposes extreme feminine (lace) with biker chic (moto jacket) and finishes off with a Balenciaga motorcycle bag. I know that this bag has peaked, and a number of years ago at that. But, I think that it might just be a modern classic. 

1) Anna Scholz Lace Biker Jacket: $183.90

2) Silver Baby Bootcut Jeans: Nordstrom: $101.96

3) Balenciaga Motorcycle Bag: preloved: $800.00

Have a wonderful day!

     

LBD's Under $50.00!

     You have $50.00 bones and a "thing" coming up...date night, drinks with the girls, parent teacher conferences, you get the idea. You want to look chic, and alluring. Maybe not for the teacher conference bit. Or maybe you do! (I remember all the single Moms in my junior high school furiously applying lipstick in the Girl's washroom before meeting with the very available French Teacher. Turns out he only liked teenage Girls and was fired from his post. True Story!)

     When buying dresses on the cheap, remember that chances are it is not going to be a mainstay in your wardrobe for long. The fabric is often pretty thin and chances are the garment isn't going to be lined. That also means the dress is going to not like being washed or ironed.  That being noted, on to the fun!

     V Necks are the most universally flattering neckline. It works for everyone. How does it pull this off? It visually elongates the neck and frames the face. It also (depends on how deep a V it is) makes a bust look less prominent and fuller face look more streamlined. (However, if you wear a V down to your belly button, this will make your bust look MORE prominent.) 

     If you are trying to balance out a fuller lower body and want to create a bust, wear something that adds volume, such as ruffles, pleats or knots. The dress furthest to the right has a knot at the neckline and would do a great job. 

     If you would like to make your legs look longer, look to the dress in the middle for tips. They have paired a short skirt with black opaque tights and black shoes. That will make your legs look like long and lean stems. A nude shoe with bare legs will also do the same trick. However, when mixing blacks, make sure you are putting warm blacks with warm blacks and cool blacks with cool blacks. The world won't be swallowed into a black hole if you don't match your warms and cools, but it just won't look as polished. How can you tell if a black is warm? It has a brown undertone.  A cool black will look like it has blue in it. The top black is a cool black, whilst the bottom black is warm. 

     The best accessory for a LBD is under $20.00 and you can get it at the Bay! What's this you ask? MAC's Russian Red lipstick. It has a blue undertone (which makes it a cool red) that makes teeth look whiter and won't make you look like you are an escort. Unless you are an escort. In that case, wear this and you could pass as a consort. Remember with red lipstick there comes a rule that you play down the rest of your makeup to make it work. The 80's might be back, but lets learn from the mistakes of the days of yore. 

    The final step in this look is chic hair. I have absolutely no abilities in this area. I can barely flat iron and no way in hell can I curl without looking like an older, fatter Shirley Temple. So, I sock bun it. All you need is an old sock and a pair of scissors and an elastic. When I say old sock, I mean clean. No one  wants hair that smells like a hockey bag. DAMN! If you have dark hair, use a black sock, and if you have lighter hair, use a lighter sock, or the sock might just peek through and knock you down a few pegs. Instructions are here. 

     Well, you have your dress, your lipstick and your sock bun! All you need now is an excuse to go out and shake what your Mama gave you!

     Here is the list of the dresses!

     Starting at the left:

1) Asos Maxi: $43.65

2) EShakti Dress: $59.95 (It is less than $50.00 if you use coupon for 20% off! Code: BGFSHN101) 

3) Carmakoma: €40.25 

4) Old Navy Wrap Dress: $32.94

5) Forever 21: $39.80

     

Wee Little Giveaway (Keysocks)

Keysocks!

Just something small to start us off.
And its not even curvy-related, its just fashion-related.

Here's the thing. I hate wearing socks with shoes that have a low vamp. I really can't stand having socks showing under my shoes. Which can be problematic in the winter, when its frickin' freezing out.
Enter: Pinterest. Someone posted this pic of these things called Keysocks. Which looked fascinating.

As an aside, I come from a long line of gadget lovers. My grandfather bought many things that came for only 4 easy payments of $XX.xx. Anyone remember Ron Popeil? Well, my grandfather was a friend to him. Not literally, I just meant he probably helped build his empire with all the shit he bought... My mother, also has her fair share of gadgets, gizmos, and doodads. Although hers are more of the cosmetic/fashion variety than, say, a Pocket Fisherman. Shit you don't often find on the shelves of stores. Stuff that you have to call a 1-800 to buy.

So, these Keysocks were like fashiony bits of gadgetry. Here is what their website says about them:

KEYSOCKS are for women and girls to wear with flats or high heels when wearing any choice of pant. This sock is the ultimate solution for keeping your feet warm and comfortable without showing you are wearing socks. There are many benefits to wearing KEYSOCKS.

• ​Warmth
• Prevents blisters
• Keeps shoes from falling off
• Helps with half sizes of shoes
• Stays on your feet unlike footies

COOLMAX wicks moisture ​+ Ultrafresh, offering Anti-Microbial Protection
Once you slip on KEYSOCKS with your favorite flats or heels you will finally experience what women have been waiting for all these years!  

Anyway, obviously I had to buy some. There was a great deal on them, so I purchased a few, and one lucky winner will win a pair of black Keysocks!

Before we get to the "entering" part of today's program, here are some things you should know about my experience with Keysocks:

• I purchased these, they were not comped to me
• They are intended to be kneesocks, but depending on the width of your calves, they may not work out that way for you. I have an 18" calf (at the muscle bit) 16" at the part where the band would sit right under the kneecap. These were not generous at the knee, but they were also not cutting off my circulation. If you have wider calves, you can still use these, you just might want to let them scrunch down a little bit. They ARE intended to go under your pants anyway...
• Personally, I don't feel these delivered on their promise not to show under shoes, BUT I have narrow feet. If you are someone with wider feet, the keyhole would likely stretch out a bit, and not show under your shoes.
• These are really quite cool, and pretty ingenious if you ask me. 

If you win them, I would really love to get a review from you! I'll post it (credited, of course) on the blog! OK, now, ENTER!

Good luck!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Bandage Skirt

I'm going to look a little rough in these pics today. You see, Today decided it was going to mess with me.
For reasons that I don't really want to go into to deeply (my own stupidity, perhaps) I ran out of gas today, on the highway.
And it was raining, torrentially.
And then my umbrella broke.
So very many other things went wrong this morning, but you don't really come here for those kind of details, do you?
Anyway, I was very excited for this OOTD post when I left the house this morning, and less so by the time I finally got here.

This outfit is a major departure from the norm for me. You see, I haven't tucked in a shirt since... well... ever. I don't have much of a waist, and I feel like tucking shirts in doesn't really work for me that well. But with this skirt, and this top, I felt like I had to give it a try.

I don't know that it was as successful in photographs as it was in my mirror (what's with the disconnect, reflection??) but, hey, we are all a work in progress.

Statement Necklaces!

     

     Oh how I love glittering jewels. I love the way the sparkle and tempt the eye and give off a look of glamour and elegance and over the top drag queen inspired finesse. I am so thrilled that statement necklaces are here in a big way. While I love simple, clean and classic jewelry, a bright and dazzling visual kick in the caboose is always welcome. 

     Rare is the trend that is accessible to plus size women at the time of its' crescendo. We often get trends ages after they have peaked. But, luckily for us, we can pretty well walk into any store that offers these pieces and walk out lighter in the wallet, but happier in the spirit. 

   

Happy Valentines Day (Lady...that's me...in Red)

The warehouse aisle is like a giant grey concrete runway, no??

Today was almost a write-off, fashion-wise. I managed to get in a shower last night, but slept on wet hair; thought today was going to be a humdinger of a bad hair day. Which in turn meant that it would be the kind of day that I would want to wear a sweatshirt to work.
But, a Valentine miracle happened, and I was up-and-at-'em at 4 am this morning. That sounds INSANE when I say (write) it out loud. I live very far from where I work, so I leave the house at 5:30, but enough of my woeful life. Point is, I was up in plenty of time to do my hair. Just do my hair. Picking out an outfit did not get a piece of that time-pie. Fortunately, I have had this little beaut sitting in the back of my closet since the Bay had a mad sale on dresses back in late November, early December. I got this for a SONG!
Dresses are so easy. Not a lot of coordinating needs to be done, just pick some jewelry and a pair of shoes, and you're solid.
So, this morning, with hair done, and robe on, I remembered this dress, and as it was red, the decision was made. It's Valentines day lovies!
For someone who waiting so long to find something peplum, I think I've worn 2 outfits with it in one week.

On The Classic Side (white blouse, black tank dress)

Can I talk to you about my first world problems?
Its harder to find the time/photographer than it is to get myself cleaned up everyday. It really is a challenge, especially because I feel like such a dork posing.
I used to watch America's Next Top Model and think that I would KILL at that show (if only I was skinny) but now I know that I would totally freeze up! That shit must be hard!
Of course, maybe if I was a skinnybitch I wouldn't be self-conscious... I feel like there is a chicken-or-the-egg thing that could go on here, but that's too close to philosophy so I'm going to drop this train of thought, in the words of the great Snoop Dogg... like its hot.

I had another outfit planned for yesterday, but it fell really flat. I had this lovely grey leopard print dress in a bit of a vintage cut (wrap bodice, cap sleeve jobbie) and I had SUCH high hopes for it. But, as it turned out, it was too big on me. I usually find that Forever21 dresses are SUPER small. Twice I have tried on dresses that I needed to try a 3X in order for it to not fit like an overstuffed sausage casing (because that look is yet to be big on the runways, but let me tell you, when it is, I will be KILLING it!)
So I bought this dress in a 3x... and wouldn't you freakin' know it... its too big.

So, here's a random tip for full-figured ladies: baggy clothes are not doing you any favours. I would rather see a curvy woman in a well-fitted dress (even a Leger-style bandage dress) than in oversized clothes. Incidentally, I also would recommend Spanx, but that's just me. Gotta keep it toit.

Anyway, went with this little ensemble instead, and I kind of feel like it wasn't being my best friend either, but I was borderline late, SUE ME. They can't all be Oscar winners, some are just Tony's. Now I've probably incurred the wrath of the Theatre Geek faction, but they really aren't that threatening. They would just sing me to death. Probably a decent way to go... what was I saying...?

Top 5 (+1) Curvy Ladies in the Media Who Represent!

When I was a kid, there were absolutely no plus-sized role models in the media.

Zero.

Zip.

Zilch.

I was not represented anywhere in the media, unless there was the fat kid that everyone was making fun of. Doesn't exactly give a young fat-kid much hope for herself. While the media has made some strides forward with the acceptance of plus-sized celebrities, I had a hard time finding the following 5 ladies. I originally wanted to do a Top 10, but I couldn't find 10.
My criteria might have been stringent, but I don't think overmuch.

In the Trenches...

I have been looking for a colourful trench ever since I saw this jacket on Kate Spade dot com. I thought that there must be something comparable in the fatosphere. Thankfully, I found all sorts of fun options in a host of colours to please anyone looking for some rainy weather cheer. Sadly, none are available in brick and mortar stores in Canada. NONE. The only store I could find a "trench coat" in was Penningtons and it was a shapeless anorak. "A line trench" my duff. I am pretty discouraged at the lack of fun and flattering clothes available off the rack. In my neck of the woods, we have Lucy and that is pretty well it. Especially since the number of Metro Vancouver Addition-Elle stores have gone from 11 to 3 in a month. (They are remaining quiet on just what their plan is for the label.)

Club Monaco For the Rest of Us!

     One of my favorite stores to go into look at all the pretty clothes is Club Monaco. This store first opened in Canada under the helm of the right honorable Alfred Sung. However, after years of having the company bounced around, it was sold to Ralph Lauren, making it now an American company. Dang. However, it is still classic with its clean lines and quality fabrics. I love it. 

     However, they only go up to a size 12, making this store off limits for me. Double dang. However, while cruising the site this morning, I came across two dresses that are made in plus sizes by Simply Be! Simply Be is a UK company that has great clothes at very reasonable prices. I cannot speak to the quality, as I have yet to order anything in from them. However, I like what I see. 

Finally, Peplum (is it dead??)

It has been said, that once a trend makes it to plus sizes, its officially dead. I'm paraphrasing, but you get the drift. That makes me very sad. Because a) I like to have trendy stuff, and b) I have been waiting to find a nice peplum shirt in plus forEVER. I finally found one over the Christmas holidays at Forever 21, and I only recently wore it. So if peplum is dead, Ima be pissed.
I have heard from some corners that the peplum trend will actually be carrying through to the Spring 2013 season, which makes me happy, so I can continue to get some use out of this shirt.
It made me feel very Chanel. I think its because of black on ivory. I probably could have worn it with some pearls to really work the look, but I didnt, because I had earrings and a bracelet that I got over the holidays as well, that I have been dying to wear.
The look is a little precious, but I think the borderline-stripper-shoes kept it from being TOO "Country Club." I love to mix very different elements together. There is a pin that I have of a black sequined jacket with distressed boyfriend jeans that I LOVE and I can't wait to recreate (although my sequin blazer is gold, rather than black).

Seeing Red!

     Valentine's Day is quickly upon us. For some, it is the "most romantic day of the year." For others, it is looked down upon like a leaper crawling across the calendar. For me, Valentine's Day is a trifecta of sure things for me. I get: 

a) action between the sheets

b) flowers of some description

c) tasty dessert

Therefore, I like this holiday, as contrived as it may be. 

Edge Meets Elegance

     If you know me well, than you can see three things about this post that are so me. Firstly, marabou is high on the list. Secondly, blush pink is a colour that occupies much of my affections. Thirdly: glitter. Glitter, sequins, shiny, sparkly! Oooo! I was lurking on the Kate Spade website when I came across the above marabou bag. I knew I had to blog about it. Moreover, I knew I had to create a delicious outfit that would showcase its' beauty. I thought I would try to juxtapose the high femininity of the pink feathers with the hard edge of a black leather moto jacket. I also coupled the sleek fit of the jacket with the more relaxed boyfriend jean. With the heels added, it brings the ensemble back to its' intended lady like feel. The pieces come from all over the globe, and are available in plus sizes. We have the jacket coming from the United States. So are the boyfriend jeans and the purse and shoes. The blouse hails from the U.K. and chances are everything was made in China. It truly was a global effort to bring this look together. Yay e-commerce!

     The items move from left to right:

1) Black Leather Jacket: Wilson Leather: $279.99 (on sale and Lamb Leather) <---does this make me an asshole?

2) Blush Roll Sleeve Blouse: Dorothy Perkins: 28.00 Pounds 

3) Boyfriend Jeans: James Jeans: Saks Fifth Avenue: $233.72

4) Blush Pink Maribou Clutch: Kate Spade: $398.00

5) Gold Glitter Heels: Kate Spade: $329.00

Cutest Outfit Imaginable...

     I came up with this outfit whilst in the shower and quickly ran out to blog about it! I am STILL in my robe with wet hair. Scratch that, I just went and put my hair up in a messy and sopping bun. I am so excited that all of these pieces are available for plus sizes. We can look amazing and foxy and oh so stylish. The neat thing about this outfit is that the shirt is under $30.00 and the skirt is under $75.00. Moreover, the lipstick and nail polish can be snapped up at any ol' drugstore. Who ever decided to put vicodin and lipstick in the same place was a beautiful genius. I kid. 

J Crew for You!

     J Crew is easily my favorite store. I LOVE it. The colours, the silhouettes, the jewelry and shoes are so fun and expressive. Simply happy clothes. However, I do not fit into anything other than the most generous of sweaters, there. They do go up to a 16, but it fits more like a 14, and I am not at 14 base camp right now. But! Fear not! I have pieced together what is a J Crew outfit using my go to brand, Talbots, and Macy's. I then tossed in the J Crew shoes for good measure and voila! I put several bunches of peonies in the graphic because a) they are beautiful and b) I am sending out a special wish to a special girl in the audience. You know who you are and you are starting your fancy new job today! Congrats! That was all said in the smoothest of smooth Casey Kasem voice, by the by. 

     Just remember, you are perfect and beautiful the way you are. Moreover, if you do some hunting, you can pretty well find most clothing items in plus size. I will keep on the hunt, too!

Here is the rundown of goods....starting at the left:

1) J Crew Inspiration Outfit

2) Jessica Simpson Colourblocked Blouse: $58.52 at Macy's

3) Pink Pencil Skirt: $99.00 at Talbots

4) Italian Made Floral Print Pumps: $320.00 at J Crew

Belts: A Very Necessary Accessory

   

     Belts. A streamlined way to add a punch of colour, polish and to either create or emphasize a waist. They are an important weapon in  the fashionista's arsenal. However, it is difficult to find a well made and chic plus size belt. I see some belts at Target, made of polyurethane with the shelf life of a few months. They split or warp or get those horrible threads hanging off of them.

     Today, I have found some actual leather plus sized belts that you can buy online for a little more money than an Asos belt, but with a lower cost per wear. Let me illustrate this point. I bought a mint belt at JC Penney. It was $10.00 and poly and I have now worn it three times and it has gone the way of the dodo. Cost per wear? $3.33. I bought a belt three years ago at talbots and it was $50.00 shipped. I wear it every second day. No joke. It is a wonderful white leather skinny belt that is embossed with a subtle lizard pattern without skinning lizards! Its' cost per wear over 3 years has been just under a dime. 

(This lizard is clearly thrilled that he and his ilk had no part in the making of today's outfit.)

     

The belts listed are clockwise starting at the top left: (All under $55.00!)

1) Old Navy $26.94 (Brown) (Probably China)

2) Desire Me Now $25.00 (Fuchsia) (Canadian Made!)

3) Artisan Leather $43.63 (Cognac) (UK Made!)

4) Talbots $39.50 (Green) (Probably China)

5) Lands End $54.00 (Black) (Probably China)

6) Talbots $44.50 (Patent) (Probably China)

7) Artisan Leather $48.48  (Black) (UK Made!)

8) Desire Me Now $25.00 (Red) (Canadian Made!)

What did we do to deserve this?

     Oh the joys of Etsy. It is a plum place to find one of a kind accessories and beautiful hand made garments designed with love and affection for the fuller figure. However, it is also a minefield for piles of dog poo passed off as couture. Watch your step as you peruse the above images. You don't want to get it on your shoe and smear it on the rug. 

     Three themes come to mind when looking at the above images. The first one is "The Dead". I don't mean the deceased, I mean The Grateful Dead. They have a cult like following around the globe, and the merch doesn't end at shows. It also pops up online. And true to the ever inclusive "Dead Heads," form, they have their clothes available in all sizes. Yay? The "inspiration" halter dress and the rainbow skirted dress are all made by "Dead Heads." I bet they are really well constructed, seeing that they are not made in a Chinese factory. However, they are so fugly. Sometimes, the worst P.O.S's last the longest. 

     The second theme to leap out is tie dye. This often goes hand in hand with "Dead Head" tomfoolery, but lucky for us, it is also embraced by the online hippie contingent. Tents are bad. Tents are light years beyond unflattering. Tents that are tie dyed make this a fug-tropolis. 

     Thirdly, almost all of the above dresses lack shape. How they think this is flattering, I don't know. If the measurements of the hip width of the garment are three times the bust and four times the waist, you have yourself a fashion crime. In fact, all of the dresses are guilty. Guilty of being the ugliest dresses I could find on Etsy for plus sized women.I didn't include links, because I don't want to encourage traffic to their stores. They might interpret that as a thumbs up. We can't have that.